Tuesday, May 07, 2024

rainy day

Thank goodness it rained. Watering crisis averted! All plants received some water. Perhaps not enough, but still, it gave them a thirst quenching lift.

My walk to the barn is stormy! I'm not one to head out when there is lightening, but the hens needed to be freed and fed and I needed a fresh bundle of lilies-of-the-valley for the breakfast table. And, too, I love looking at the lilac in full bloom, when it is drooping with rain!




It's a different side of a garden -- the wet one that hides secrets from the casual passerby. 

 

 

 

In a strange way, it reminds me of the first movie I went to see in New York when I moved there to be an au pair and to finish college -- the Garden of the Finzi-Continis.  It was the first time that I thought of a garden as a place that shelters, that keeps from view both the outside world to those within, and those within from the outside world. I had learned much about World War II in my last year of high school in Poland, but my focus had been a Polish one. The movie was almost like a start to my stepping out of that paradigm and into a broader one. Suddenly other stories, complicated ones, coming from complicated countries became important. In the movie, the story is of an Italian aristocratic Jewish family, as Fascism grips their country. It's a haunting movie that stays with me even now as I listen to the birds in the quietness of our own farmette garden and I look at the drooping flowers of the lilac bush.


Breakfast, at the kitchen table. With freshly picked lilies.




Rain. The plants needed water and I needed time away from the garden. My mom requires extra attention at the moment. She is in a downward spiral mood-wise and that does her no good. Indeed it's fair to say that it does no one any good. Figuring out how to deal with this takes time. At present she is not capable of making decisions for herself. That then falls on me.

Too, I return to lend a hand over at Steffi's House. This one:




My friend's project requires going forward with some choices and I'm good at that! I meet a bunch of people there for a consultation about windows. It turns out that this is one of the big decisions that you have to make when you buy a new house -- what will cover the windows? All sixteen of them here? My advice is simple: stick to neutral and keep the price down. The house already will eat up a chunk of money. Go easy on it!

And, too, I needed to catch up with my friend in Warsaw. I thought I could squeeze in a few morning minutes for a Zoom call but of course that's just impossible. I love our conversations too much to limit them to a few minutes.

Before very long it's time to pick up the kids. We never got the whopping winds nor the tornadoes that spun through the states to the south of us and for that I am very grateful, but oh my did the rains come down when the kids left the school! 

It was all very localized. By the time we got back to the farmette, the rains had stopped. Indeed, the downpour never touched our land. We had rain, but no downpour. What a difference a few miles makes!





(Today, he wants to listen to the war story with his sister...)





Stormy wet days are like that: you dont want to move too far away from where the others are hanging out.

 

And there you have it -- my rainy day. My beautifully wet rainy May day. 


Monday, May 06, 2024

a lilac Monday

What's the date today? Can you draw a cube? Face, velvet, church, daisy, red. What five words did I just say? Count back from 100, by seven. Repeat the following numbers. And now those five words again.

There, I've just given you some hints on how to ace the cognitive decline test. Because I did ace it and though I'm 71 and not 80, I can claim competence at sufficient levels to have me run for president, but for the fact that I don't much care for the job and am not qualified for it by virtue of having been born in Poland, among other things.

I agreed to the test while I was at a doc's office for something else. They say that they're trying to catch early dementia and Alzheimer's in people my age. It did lead me to wonder if I really want to ruin the rest of my decade by finding signs of possible decline. Would you want to know? Would I have felt compelled to tell you had I come in below 100%? Would you still read Ocean if you know its author was slipping?

All good questions! Going to doctors at my age is almost like going to music lessons -- there's no end in sight because they always think of other things they can test, which then leads you to consult with someone else, because my acing of the cognitive decline test to the contrary, at my age, you typically can expect to come in with subpar results somewhere along the line, and unraveling stuff is a forever thing. Ed doesn't engage the medical profession in this way and of course, the broader question then is -- why do I? It takes up time and today, I felt especially prickly about having to break up my morning because the day is just so beautiful! Here, follow along on my morning walk. It's the hour of the lilac, that's for sure!

(looking out the kitchen window...)



(the last tulip days...)




(allium coming into bloom: note the purple flower heads on long stems)



(the unbelievably awesome lilac, rewarding us for the three year pruning work we did on it)



(the early irises)



(but let's get back to the lilac!)



Breakfast, also with lilacs, on the porch.




We have another lilac -- a later blooming one, right behind the trash bins. It hasn't been doing well for years now and today I decided to do something about it and I guess I'm happy to have worked on it, but on the other hand, in digging around, I found a lot of rot in the trunk and root system. A metaphor for sure! Are we better off knowing that the lilac actually has a limited life span before it? On the flip side, I did dig out the rot and left behind some half healthy roots and branches and we put compost and chips on it and it's looking okay and maybe we will have saved it... Oh, the dilemmas forced upon us by nature!

More weed digging and pulling followed, but honestly, not too much because we are on the dry side of things. Weeds slow down when the rains stop. I'm hoping we're not headed for another drought this year! Watering plants can take even more time than digging up weeds. 

And soon it's time to pick up Snowdrop.




("the tulips smell great too!")


The entire afternoon is spent reading chapter after chapter of The Night War (the new novel by Kimberly Brubaker Bradley). It's a World War II story, but, too, it's a story about overcoming adversity and channeling your inner strength to get through tough times. Helping kids develop resilience has to be one of the more important things we can do. Perhaps listening to stories about children suddenly confronting harrowing wars and tough life choices can help in this. [Or it can lead to nightmares! Hard to say how much of this is too much. Snowdrop brought up Anne Frank on our evening car ride. Clearly this stuff is on her mind.]

I leave you with an evening lilac photo. Because this moment really does belong to that ephemeral, scented purple bloom.  

 



with love...


Sunday, May 05, 2024

farmette Sunday

Oh, but I love those kids! The big two and their little guys. The two young families. Each day more, as I discover new little permutations on personality traits that are so familiar to me, yet always sprouting totally delightful new ideas, new ways of moving through the day!

Yeah, it was great to have them all together here. It's always great, but somehow, as I get older, it just gets greater.

Even though the day got off to a very early start. Too early! I woke up at 4 and tried to check off in my head all that I wanted to do for today's family brunch at the farmhouse. And it struck me that there's a lot on that list, and they're all coming on the early side, and, too, I wanted to bake, and my younger girl wanted to visit my mother in the hospital with me before our get together. I realized I needed to be up before my usual morning wake up hour. By 4:30 I was in the shower and a few minutes later I was up chasing the cats out and setting the table. And mixing the batter for this rhubarb cake. (Lilac and lily-of-the-valley, as well as the rhubarb, supplied by farmette lands)




A very quick walk outside, to admire those early rays of sunlight as they play with the flowers and grasses.




It's going to be a beautiful day!







Most of prep work done, I set out to pick up daughter. Our visit to the hospital is a bit of a bust because my mother had been grumpy this morning and so the staff helped her ease her displeasure with some calming meds. This zonked her out, so we saw my sleeping mother. Ah well, my daughter said it was important to stop by anyway, since she is not up here (from Chicago) so often and, well, my mother is 100 so opportunities for seeing each other are rare.

From there, we drive to pick up bakery items from Madison Sourdough (of course! my predictable favorite bread and croissant bakery in Madison), and then at Tati's Cafe in the new development to stock up on caffeine (and while there, we may as well drive by Steffi's House, because my girl is curious about stuff like that) and finally home, to the farmhouse, where just after 10:30 everyone gathers.

It's funny -- in my after-school care for the big two Madison kids, no one wants to play outside. Max five minutes and they clamor to come in. Today, at least four of the grandkids are itching to find dandelion puffs, to scamper away from adults across farmette fields. Well fine, it is a gorgeous day, but can you please pause for a photo? 




Thank you!

(so many violets to pick...)


 

 


 

 

(so many mowed trails to follow!)


I chase them further, to do a two family photo. This is important to me, and they know it, and everyone works hard to make it happen. Sure, it's tough to get nine people, with five of them under the age 10, to look their best in a group shot, but I think this one turned out okay!




This is when the bacon turned rather crispy in the oven, due to neglect.

(meanwhile, the big girls beg for hose time... I never say no to hose time... true, someone always gets wet, but still, it's worth it!)


 

No matter. Some people are fine with extra crispy bacon and other have plenty of other foods to choose from. Cheeper eggs with garden chives, some garden asparagus, some tomatoes, bakery items, cheeses, fruits. I do not ever forget how fortunate we are with our food selections.

(on the table: the violets picked by all the kids)



Brunch:



And after, the big kids want to go out once again. The youngest one, Juniper,  goes along for a tiny bit, but it's getting awfully close to her nap and there are still toys inside she hasn't explored.  She stays out long enough for one of the dads to take a photo that properly belongs to Mother's Day, so I'll post it, but in a week. 

(the kids, minus Juniper, escaping from the call of the adults!)



In the early afternoon, the youngest family heads southeast and the other guys head northwest. Me, I stay home to tidy, and to think sweet thoughts about these people that I love so very, very much! I had them all with me and it was grand!


Saturday, May 04, 2024

birthday second round, mother's day first round

When one of your children lives in a different town, you have to be flexible about family celebrations. You can't always come together on the bull's eye date. You move things around, because a few days in one direction or the other isn't going to matter. The point is to celebrate together. When the stars are aligned.

My younger girl is coming up from Chicago with her family today to do some celebrating. My birthday, Mother's Day. I am so psyched for it, possibly because I love both days, all the more so because they fall into this awesome window of seasonal magnificence. 

 


 

 

I do wish I was better prepared for it, but things have been rather hectic lately and so I'm only sort of ready. Meaning, the farmhouse is clean, but you wouldn't want to do surgery in any of the rooms. Tidy, but it wouldn't win contests for that either. No matter! We are celebrating!

After the morning farmette routines...


(apple blossom snowflakes!)



...Which include the walk, the breakfast (on a porch scented with lilac blossoms).










And now it's time to meet up at the downtown Farmers Market. A good starting point for our family weekend!

(they're here!)









(and so are the local cousins!)



(all five!)



(the very rare candid photo with all nine young family members)



(the market in May: flowers, asparagus, rhubarb)






(hand games)



Afterwards, some of the cousins play, others nap, then work on a construction project, then rest.

(build)



(build for real)



(rest)



(presenting, unsuccessfully, an argument as to why the hose water should be turned on)


And in the evening all 11 of us come together at Sardine. Yes, same place as last year. No surprise there -- I like Sardine! And we are celebrating!

(I asked Ed for this group photo. It's never easy to take one of a long table at a busy restaurant)



(oh these two... the oldest of the grandkids)



(and the youngest)



(drawing...)




(dessert)



(total love, for the whole bunch of them)


Happy birthday indeed!!

with so much love...